Beauty and the Beast at Newcastle Theatre Royal

Beauty and the Beast at Theatre Royal, Newcastle

Ask anyone what they think of as the signal that Christmas is coming and they might say Christmas adverts, songs on the radio, planning a big meal, buying gifts, the Coca Cola wagon but for me the real sign is when the Theatre Royal start their Pantomime.  Rightly heralded as one of the very best in the country, this year’s offering of QDOS’s Beauty and the Beast has taken the very best elements of the traditional seasonal fun and blown it into a new level altogether.  This is not just panto excellence, this is theatre excellence.

While some pantos have resorted to using gimics to try and set themselves apart – 3D visions, cameos by pop stars and reality tv, bizarre twists in the story,  all of them, bar none, pale into insignificance when compared to Newcastle’s finest.  Written, produced and directed by a team who all hail from or are based in the North East, this show is perfection beyond compare and instantly taps into our rich culture, heritage and love of laughing.

The story retains everything about the original and why wouldn’t it – it’s a wonderful story tailor made for panto.  The sets are exquisite, rich, deep and packed with detail.  Choreography, both in costume design and routines are like a mix of the most elegant Viennese ball and the best bits of Strictly.

Of course, what makes a Panto really shine is the cast and once again, Newcastle have the best in the country, if not the whole of Panto world.

 

Danny Adams, Clive Webb and Michael Potts provide so much fun they should carry a health warning, Chris Hayward as Mrs Rita Potty is the Geordie mother we all wish we had and the beautiful Laura Evans as Belle ensures we have some delightful feminine charms to counter the madness.  Nicola Meehan sets the scene for the whole evening with a breathtaking transformation from old hag to stunning enchantress whilst Chris Cowley as both the prince and the beast is totally believable as bad guy made good.  Even Wayne Smith as Belle’s desperate love wannabee elicits some sympathy, possibly in part because he is a wonderful mix of Lazy Town’s Robbie Rotten and Elvis Presley.

Having watched lots of pantos all round the country I do believe that Newcastle is blessed with something others can only wish for – Danny Adams in his finest.  Danny is worth coming to see on his own, he is a magician in his art and had this 50yr old rolling in the isles along with the 5 and 6 years olds (though often for very different reasons).  A master of slapstick, ably abetted by panto stalwarts  Webb and Potts, at times I found myself begging for him to stop just so I could grab a desperate breath or two.  He is a magical blend of Lee Evens, Norman Wisdom, Max Wall (yes I’m that old), Freddie Starr and Tommy Cooper with a penchant for tongue twisters and singing that would paralyse most people’s vocal chords.  One song in particular, where he names all the people and places in the North East should be used as by the tourist board as an advert.

What is most noticeable about this panto is that despite there being an obvious billing hierarchy, and a group who are into their 15^th year at the Theatre Royal, everyone, and I mean everyone, has equal input into making it the best Christmas show in the country.

My advice, if you love to laugh, if you love to see others laugh (including the cast) and if you love yourself, then get tickets for this – you’ll be on a high for days after.

A 5 start show with an extra star for Danny Camp, this return to traditional panto is packed with laughs, stunts, knife throwing, mess, gloop, brilliant songs and bags and bags of fun.  

On until Saturday 19^th January 2020

Curtains, the Musical Murder Mystery

Set in 1950’s Boston, Curtains follows the story of a pre-broadway musical whose cast and crew suffer the trials and tribulations of not only the murder of their leading lady on opening night, but the subsequent twists and turns of the resulting investigation.  Set against the backdrop of ‘Robbin Hood’ a musical western, this play within a play (or more accurately, a musical within a musical) is as much about the saving of the show as much it is about the murder mystery.  As the detective leading the investigation puts the whole theatre on lock down, relationships fray, pressure rises and fingers are pointed.  There are plots and subplots galore, some very clever and funny musical numbers and no shortage of jokes.

From the opening bars you can hear the refrains of Kander & Ebb classics such as Chicago and Cabaret but this is much more than simply another of the same.  Director Paul Foster has made sure this lesser known show stands on its own; it has a familiarity which immediately makes it accessible yet has enough in reserve to maintain intrigue and a freshness to encourage repeat viewings.

Jason Manford (known recently for Scarborough on TV and The Producers and Chitty Chitty Bang Bang on stage) plays the lead character of Detective Frank Coiffi, a wannabee thespian and amateur musical theatre star who has as much input into resurrecting the stricken show as he does in solving the crime.  Manford holds his character perfectly, part Columbo, part Poirot with a pretty decent Boston accent to boot.  He revels in the musical elements, giving us a chance to hear a great voice and some pretty nifty dance moves and, as one would expect his comic timing is impeccable.

Playing opposite Coiffi, in the role of Georgia Hendricks, the show’s lyricist who is thrust into the limelight following the untimely death of the original lead, is Carley Stenson.  No stranger to musical and comedy theatre, Carley lights up the stage regardless of whether it’s her scene or not – she has a wonderful, powerful voice and, as seen in the finale to act 1 number ‘Thataway’ is a very adept dancer to boot.  Her duets with Andy Coxon as Aaron Fox, her on stage writing partner,  are simply magical.

Two other standout performances are Rebecca Lock as show producer Carmen Bernstein and Samuel Holmes as show director Christopher Belling.  Rebecca plays Carmen with strength, style and plenty of sass, very reminiscent of the Mama Morton part in Chicago but with the Boston dirt under her fingernails.  

Samuel Holmes however, is totally English and because of that he can get away with pretty much anything.  His Belling is acerbic, driven, suffers no fools and knows that, despite anything on the bill, HE is the real star of the show.  Totally captivating and utterly charming.

Packed full of musical numbers this is a wonderful opportunity for the people of Darlington to see the early stages of what is destined to be a smash hit.  Curtains has already announced it will soon transfer to the West End at the Wyndham Theatre so there’s no better time to grab a ticket and enjoy some brilliant 5 star comedy musical murder mystery.

Jekyll and Hyde at Darlington Hippodrome

Jekyll and Hyde by Darlington Operatic Society

It’s not often that you get chance to see something new, for which you have no preconceived ideas and have been able to avoid any previous reviews.  Whilst many have read the story of Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde, there are few who have seen it as a musical and even fewer who will have enjoyed such a powerful and professional production as Darlington Operatic Society are performing.

With the story closely following Robert Louis Stevensons’s classic gothic tale, this deep view of the human psyche exposes the fundamental challenges everybody has; there is good and evil in us all, it is how we control them that determines who we are.

For this performance, the eponymous lead is played by Luke Oldfield who, from the very first scene, is the quintessential Victorian scientist, long hair tied back, resplendent in waistcoat and presenting with the clipped accent of the London elite.  His appeal to the governing body for their approval to continue his experiments is almost Darwinian yet, even at this apparent sane stage, he is able to convey a deeper desire, a drive to succeed and a passion to do so at all costs, especially when they all vote to refuse him his request and so sew the seeds of hatred which grow into the actions of murder.

The gentleman doctor is engaged to be married to socialite Emma Carew (played by the one and only Beth Hopper whose voice is instantly recognisable and as warm and welcome as summer rain) so he finds his passions for science somewhat constrained by the expected façade of society.  Torn between playing the expected love struck fiancée and his true passion for scientific discovery, it is when the good Doctor assumes his alter ego that Luke goes though a metamorphosis which would rival many CGI driven movies. 

His long hair becomes an unkept mass, his body seems to grow to almost twice his size and the menace he exudes is simply terrifying.  At first you will find yourself checking that there are not two actors but no, it is simply a masterclass to any actor on how to drive a character into the heart of the performance.  Driven by his being shunned by his peers, Hyde sets out to wreak his own sense of justice, with murderous intent.

As the Doctor begins to wrestle with his inner demon he seeks solace with Lucy, a hard candy coated, soft centred working girl who sees in Dr Jekyll a turmoil and anguish she can relate to.  Sadly for both her and the doc, Mr Hyde also sees Lucy as someone he can engage with, and despite, or perhaps because, of Jekyll's affections, he sets out to destroy her.  Jessica Harrison, as Lucy, is outstanding.  Often such platitudes are used lightly but here it is so very much deserved and as the 3^rd person in a triangle of turmoil, she plays the innocent loser with such passion and compassion that it is hard not to be moved to tears.

The sets and costumes for this production are steeped in Victoriana – elegant gowns and capes of high society are played off against the rags and squalor of the London slums while the soundtrack is very much akin to the depth and magnitude of Les Miserables – anthemic themes are balanced against soulful solos.

Darlington Operatic Society are widely heralded as the region’s best amateur theatre company but this production surely elevates them into a new and exciting division – I doubt that there are many, if any, companies across the whole UK who can deliver such a polished and professional performance.  As someone who now works in London, this is a performance that would not be out of place amongst the West End – for the people of Darlington, you must go and see this.

 

Running from October 23^rd until 2^nd November at Darlington Hippodrome, Tickets are on sale now by calling the Ticket Hotline on 01325 244659 or online at www.darlingtonos.org.uk.  

DISCLAIMER Neither DOS nor your author can be held liable for any nightmares following this show.

Advisory 12 years+

CURTAINS THE MUSICAL

In a church hall nestled alongside high rise flats and just behind the bustling high street, the cast and crew of soon to be smash hit musical Curtains are going through their last few weeks of rehearsals.  With household names such as Jason Manford, Carley Stenson and Ore Oduba on the bill and directed by Paul Taylor this is the accumulation of 18 months of preparation for a show that blends murder mystery, comedy, great songs and a harking back to the glitz and glamour of the 1950’s.

Written by the creators of arguably two of last century’s greatest musicals (Cabaret and Chicago) Curtains is something rarely found in this modern age of instant knowledge and even quicker criticism; a show that is so fresh and new and exciting that (for now at least) not many people are aware of it.  It had a small run on Broadway in the mid 2000’s, has been played by amateur and high school groups in the US and popped up a few times in other countries, but this new tour will prove to be its UK debut across the country and is destined to become the ‘must see’ production of the past (and next) 5 years.  Darlington Hippodrome will be the first theatre in the North East to present Curtains and a wonderful opportunity for the area.

The premise is quite a simple one – the theatre production of Robbin’ Hood, a Wild West tale, is in turmoil on its opening night as their leading lady is murdered, but as local detective Frank Cioffe begins to investigate it becomes clear that there are more than one or two who might benefit from her demise.  A classic play within a play ensues with twists and turns aplenty.

We met up with the leads and director as they took a break from rehearsals and asked them a few questions about playing in Curtains.

Jason Manford who plays detective Frank Cioffe. Jason is as warm and funny off stage as he is on it, instantly relatable and an all-round great guy.

Jason, you’re enjoying quite a renaissance on TV and radio at the moment with Scarborough, QI, 8 out of 10 cats, Absolute Radio and even some reruns of your Plus Net ads, are some people surprised that you are also a stage actor and even more so that you can sing ?

JM I come from a large family, my grandparents had 12 children and, in the times before TV they needed to be able to keep them entertained, so my grandmother always made sure they sang together and this has continued through my parents and down to me.  Singing is a great community activity, and even though I would have never classed myself as a singer as such, I really enjoy it.  Starting off in stand up, I learned very quickly that regardless of what stage you’re on, it’s all acting so I guess I’ve always been able to perform.

I saw you singing with Alfie Boe in Preston, especially Stars from Les Miserable which is a very powerful song, and you have had lead roles in The Producers and Chitty Chitty Bang Bang .  Is the singing element of Frank Cioffe something that particularly appealed to you about the role?

JM Actually, the appeal was everything I know and love about theatre is here in Curtains – great songs, a brilliant script that is witty and funny, the plot twists of a murder mystery and a chance to be a part of a show created by Ebb and Kander.  I love Cabaret and Chicago so this is a bit like finding an album by your favourite group that you didn’t know existed.  Added to that the wonderful cast and a brilliant director in Paul (Foster) and it was too good an opportunity to miss.

Tell us a bit about your character, Frank Cioffe

JM Frank is a detective, a very good detective, but his real passion is theatre.  He is a member of his local Am Dram company and lives all year for their summer production so when he gets the chance to investigate a murder at a ‘professional’ production, surrounded by ‘real’ actors he is in his element.  He thrives on the energy of being around the show which gives him even more determination to not only find the killer but to help ensure the show goes on.  There is a little bit of a love interest, and some outright crazy characters he has to deal with but he manages to stay focussed.  I guess he’s a bit Columbo, a bit Poirot and a lot (Leo) Bloom (from The Producers, a role which Jason played in 2015), in fact there is a great similarity between Frank and Leo – they are both in quite mundane day jobs hankering for the bright lights and razzmatazz of the stage.

As many people will not have heard of Curtains, how would you sell it ?

JM Curtains has all the elements of the great comedy musicals, song and dance routines to rival the classics and the intrigue of a murder mystery – what’s not to love?

Carley Stenson plays Georgia Hendricks one half of the songwriting team behind the show within a show Robbin’ Hood. The room lit up when Carley came in, she is the absolute definition of ‘a smile’ with an infectious and completely disarming personality

Carley, you have a wonderful pedigree for musical theatre having starred in Les Miserables, Legally Blonde, Shrek, Spamalot – how does Curtains rate with these shows?

CS It’s not often you get a chance to perform in a ‘new show’, one that has not had the exposure or perhaps hype as others so it’s both exciting and nerve racking – we are almost responsible for whether Curtains makes it in the UK but with that being said, a show by Kander and Ebb is pretty much a seal of quality.  Curtains is a delight, funny, clever and some great songs

It’s been 10 years since you left Hollyoaks so in effect you’ve been doing theatre just as long as you did TV – do you feel that theatre is your true calling now?

CS I loved Hollyoaks, the storylines were great, intense and it meant I personally benefited from being associated with such a successful show, but I have always loved theatre.  Me and my friends used to put on our own shows, creating costumes, sets and performing so now I have been able to do it as a job has been wonderful.  I have been very fortunate to plays some iconic modern roles in musical theatre.

Curtains is a musical murder mystery but from watching the rehearsals, there also seems to be a lot of humour too, is it safe to say that it is more a comedy than anything else?

(Carley’s eyes positively twinkle and her smile grows even brighter) 

CS Yes, there’s a lot of comedy in Curtains, helped in no small part by the brilliant cast we have and the way we have all embraced bringing this ‘new’ show to the UK .  We have had so much fun preparing for this show that you can’t help transfer that to the stage and hopefully that will give the audience a feel good factor when they watch it.  There are times where I have to avoid eye contact with one or two of the cast or I know I will risk laughing myself, Jason (Manford) is simply brilliant in his comedic timing and Sam (Holmes who plays the show’s Director Christopher Belling) is so quick with his acerbic wit that he has me in stitches.

As we have mentioned to others, Curtains is relatively unknown at present.  How would you sell it to an audience whose time (and money) is being chased by other shows, cinema, TV etc.

CS Curtains is a hark back to the grand productions of 1950s MGM – a time when things were done on a massive scale of glamour and glitz.  We have some great big musical numbers, brilliantly written and great fun to perform. It is unapologetic in giving the audience a chance to escape the day to day problems and worries, not only is it funny it is very clever and will keep everyone guessing right up the last.

Director Paul Foster, Betty’s tea shop aficionado and lover of old books.

Paul, you have directed some of traditional theatres great shows; Kiss Me Kate, Annie Get Your Gun, Tell Me On A Sunday, Singin’ in the Rain to name but a few, how does Curtains rate?

PF Any Kander and Ebb show already comes with a level of brilliance built in so part of my challenge is not to ruin it, but Curtains, as a relatively unknown show to the general public, carries a little more risk.  That being said, I feel that the art of putting on a great show is to tell a story, once the cast are on board and the stage is set, it is the story that becomes the show so in that respect I think Curtains will be a huge hit.  It might take a little time for people to realise, as with anything new you need advocates and fans to help spread the word, but with our cast I am confident that people are going to love it.

You mention the cast and names such as Jason (Manford), Carley (Stenson) and Ore (Oduba) will undoubtedly bring a degree of interest, how have they and the rest of the cast taken to the roles.

PF I believe that the art of being a good director is not to set limits on people but to help them understand what you need and let them grow the part.  If you place a plant under glass it might grow quickly but it will stop when it reaches the glass so I try not to have any upper limits. The roles are well enough defined to carry the story but there is so much scope for them to develop that everyday I am seeing more and more.

And with that, Paul and the gang headed back to rehearsals, perfectly delivering the theatrical coup de grace and leaving us wanting more.

From our brief watch of rehearsals, it is clear that Curtains is going to be huge and will give audiences the chance to be there at the start – think Rocky Horror Show, Little Shop of Horrors, Grease, The Full Monty, even Hamilton, shows for which the boast of “I saw it first” have become bragging rites for theatre goers the world over.  

This is a huge coup for Darlington to be the first theatre in the North East to present Curtains and wonderful recognition of the appeal the Hippodrome has for touring productions.  

It’s sure to sell out soon, grab your tickets now.

Curtains comes to Darlington Hippodrome from November 12^th – tickets https://www.darlingtonhippodrome.co.uk/whats-on/curtains/

For more details and some exclusive cast videos check out Curtains website - https://curtainsmusical.com/

Friendsical - The Friends Musical Parody

The One with All the Laughing – a 5 star show deserving of a 2 part review. 

Part 1…..

“The One with the set up”

For 10 seasons, 236 episodes and countless cultural spin offs, Friends, the 90’s show penned by David Crane and Marta Kauffman set the standard and blueprint for modern sitcoms.  Its lovable characters gained such followings that a simple change of hairstyle would send thousands to the salons to insist on a ‘Rachel’.  Since its final airing in May 2004, episodes have garnered a new following, mainly from re-runs on Channel 4 and Netflix.  Those who watched it originally were now sat with their teenage children watching it again, lamenting the more simple times it portrayed and even calling out for a reunion (or movie).

“The One with the Stage Show”

Well, fans need fret no more as Friendsical, the Parody Musical written and directed by Miranda Larson is on tour and guarantees a 5 star laugh-in which demands multiple watches just to get all the clever in jokes.  Fresh from a sell out run at the Edinburgh Fringe, Miranda has brilliantly written a story of a show within the show, having the ‘real’ Ross Geller put on a musical depicting his life during the 10 years of the show, his ‘On again, off again’ relationship with Rachel Green and the gang of 6 caffeine addicts.  Often having the cast freezing the scene to break the 4^th wall and engage the audience, Larson lets the viewers feel they are in on Ross’s plans for his show while the others just wonder “where is Bonnie” ?  The genius of the writing means at times the cast are asking each other why the show doesn’t match the TV, even giving each other spoiler alerts based on what their characters should do later in the run.

“The One where the Brilliant Writer and Director picks what to use”

Using instantly recognisable tropes and brilliant observations of episodes, characters and oft-asked questions and fan theories, Miranda presents an whistlestop run through the 10 year’s story arcs, mashing up the timelines and injecting comedy music & dance numbers that give the audience little time to catch breath from laughing.  Monica’s Game Night, Ross’s fashion faux pas, Rachel’s hair, Chandler’s dance, Phoebe’s singing and Joey’s …. well, ‘Joeyisms’ are all there in a magnificent homage, ably supported by Gunter’s unrequited love, Janices’ OMG’s and cameos from other friends.  Major events such as Naked Thursday, the power cut, saying the wrong name at a wedding, a gold bikini and getting ready for a dinosaur convention all feature and are destined to delight friends fans across the country.

“The One where Ross and Rachel are on again (for now)”

Of course, a show like this needs to have a cast that the audience can recognise and boy do they hit that nail square on the head.  The mannerisms of Jamie Lee-Morgan as Ross is uncanny – he looks like David Schwimmer but even more impressive, his dorky, foppish fawning and frustrated attempts to control life is comedy gold.  Fans will instantly see the Ross on tranquilizers, the Ross on prom night, the Ross on a break.  Playing opposite Lee-Morgan is Charlotte Elisabeth York as Rachel Green.  From her manic introduction in rain soaked wedding dress, York takes Jennifer Aniston’s spoilt rich girl persona and gives it both barrels (literally, with her not so subtle nod to her ever growing ‘points of view’).  The two of them create a fabulous lampoon of their ‘On Again, Off Again relationship’ which is one of the hilarious musical numbers.

“The One where Monica and Chandler avoid moustaches”

Obsessive Monica with her megalomania towards order and control is played by Sarah Goggin and she absolutely nails it.  Sarah’s perfection of Monica is wonderfully astute; desperate to be the lynch-pin the group revolve around, she has Monica’s compulsions, psychoses and desires all tied up in a bundle of seven.  Thomas Mitchells plays her beau to be Chandler, the sweater vest wearing data transponster, with aplomb;  always looking for the ‘witty’ one liner, plagued by a previous love, and destined to do his victory dance with Monica, Mitchells gives comedy gold with his fear of Richard’s Moustache.

“The One where Phoebe jumps for joy and Duncan steals the show”

Ally Retberg is ever lovable Phoebe, complete with guitar, kooky life story and triplets.  Ally has Phoebe’s puppy-like excitability off to a tee, jumping for joy as every little victory is celebrated and always looking for the sunshine behind the clouds.  At present, Joey is played by Duncan Burt (standing in for Jordan Fox) and, like the rest of the cast, is brilliant in his portrayal of everyone’s favourite soap doctor.  Whilst there is little evidence of Joey’s Queens’ accent, his innocent misunderstandings and love for sandwiches are immediately recognisable, as his is charisma and charm for the ladies.  Particularly impressive is Duncan’s recollection of all of Joey’s lady friends, a list that rivals the colours of Joseph’s Dream Coat.

Whilst the main cast also play one or two other cameos, the main support comes from Rebecca Withers who pops up as Gunter, Janice, a brilliant Richard and an hilarious Emily, giving the scenes even more comedic richness.

“The One where you go buy tickets”

Friendsical is a 2 hour spectacularly funny, heart warming look back to TV for simpler times before the real world pressures of Brexit, Trump, Global Warming, Recession and without the ‘wokeness’ of current PC correctness dominated the writers room. 

Friendsical is on at the wonderful Northern Stage until Saturday 6th and then on tour – check out the website for dates and tickets - https://britishtheatre.com/friendsical-uk-tour/

Part 2….

A brilliantly funny, clever and witty retelling of the story of Friends.  It’s like going to see your favourite aunt who is now in a nursing home with dementia – she remembers most of what happened but it’s not exactly the same, the timelines get a bit confused but overall you can sit and laugh at the shared memories.

Cornish Arsonist Strikes Again

Local police and fire leaders have today issued an alarming statement that the recent and ongoing fires in the Amazon may have been started deliberately by a Cornish woman.  Following an extensive investigation spanning multi agencies and including NASA, Interpol and Aldi, it is believed that a resident of Bodmin with a previous record for burning trees could be responsible for the devastating blazes.

I'm a Firestarter, twisted Firestarter.

The fires in the Amazon are “extraordinarily concerning” for the planet’s natural life support systems, the head of the UN’s top biodiversity body has said in a call for countries, companies and consumers to build a new relationship with nature. But this may just be an escalation of a current spate of intentional firestarting.

Cristiana Paşca Palmer, the executive secretary of the UN Convention on Biological Diversity, said the destruction of the world’s biggest rainforest was a grim reminder that some people have no affinity with trees and indeed are driven by a powerful urge to remove them from the planet.  This could lead to  ecosystems declining to a point of no return, with dire consequences for humanity.

Kiss me Hardy, Nelson's Oak that has stood for over 300 years

“The Amazon fires make the point that we face a very serious crisis,” she told the Cornish Guardian. “But it is not just the Amazon. We’re also concerned with what’s happening in other forests and ecosystems, especially in Cornwall holiday parks and fishing lakes.  Recently a 300 year old oak tree planted by Admiral Horatio Nelson was needlessly torched, producing a 'scorched earth' situation and paving the way for 3 new lodges to be built.  The risk is we are moving towards the tipping points that scientists talk about that could produce cascading collapses of natural systems.”

Just a little cig ?

Among those who will address a hastily arranged summit is the Swedish climate activist Greta Thunberg, who arrived in New York this week after sailing across the Atlantic on a zero-carbon racing yacht.  “Even on a boat I heard about the Oak Tree Fire in Cornwall. It’s devastating,” she told a press conference on the quayside. “It’s so horrible. It’s hard to imagine. The war against nature must end.”  Earlier in the year, the teenage campaigner urged action against deforestation. “We are literally sawing off the branch we live on,” she wrote.

getting warmer

Several countries have recently organised massive tree-planting campaigns. Last month, Ethiopia claimed a record of 350m seedlings in a day. There have also been significant efforts in China, which has pledged to plant an area the size of Ireland every year, while the Indian state of Punjab has introduced a scheme to link gun licences to tree planting. Scientists say tree planting has an important role to play in climate stabilisation, but ensuring there was sufficient clearance to cast a pellet waggler was crucial otherwise they will just lead to a proliferation of 'pole only' pegs.

But what motive could someone have for the devastation currently being caused.  It is believed that the recent spate of tree burning may come from one person, a local artist by whose own admission prefers to paint seascapes. But why would someone go to such drastic lengths.

A happy little tree with his mates

Dr Patrick Church, renowned behavioural psychologist and Arsenal fan proffers that “this deep seated hatred of trees could come from the fact that, thanks to pioneering environmentalists like Bob Ross, people expect a ‘happy little tree’ to be in every painting they see”.  Mr Ross, a world expert on beating the devil out of things, has always maintained that it is easy to paint a tree and in fact it’s sometimes essential to have a little friend or two for any main feature tree or bush.  Dr Church continues”… whilst this is seen by the world over as lovely, there are those who, despite or in spite of their talent to paint boats, fish and cats, struggle to paint trees.  As such, by removing all trees from the planet there will be no references on which to paint and the clamour for trees to be ever present will be removed.”

This used to be the Eden Project, Cornwall

The investigation into the current devastation continues with experts now looking back at previous large forest fires; Camp Fire in California (2018), Iberian wildfires (2017), Greek Forest Fires (2007). UN Fire Chief, the Swedish expert Anders Mahose, has added that speculation surrounding the origins of the Great Fire of London (1666), Krakatoa (East of Java) (1878) and even Pompeii (AD 79) cannot be ruled out although these fires did not specifically target trees – that said, they could point to an alarming possibility that once all trees have been removed, the culprit could move onto burning other things that don’t make for good seascapes.

If you have been affected by anything in this story, or feel that you may have information that could assist in the investigation, please contact us

Book of Mormon at Sunderland Empire

Life of Brian meets South Park in this outrageously funny musical; don't be afraid to laugh, loud and long.

The creators of anarchic ‘kids’ cartoon South Park, Matt Stone and Trey Parker have written one of the all time funniest musicals, jampacked with fun-poking, heckle-raising, unbridled (and unapologetic)  attacks on one of the most elusive religions in America.  In doing so, they have given the current ultra-PC society a fantastic escape where you can laugh out at bigotry, snort with derision at the fallacies of religion and struggle to breath with the sheer ‘middle finger to tradition’.

The tale is of two Mormon missionaries, teenage boys who are destined, by their culture, to set out to a distant place and bring the teachings of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.  For our two starlets, Elder Price (the all American, god fearing, 3^rd gen Mormon – played by Kevin Clay) and Elder Cunningham (the chubby misfit whose attempts to fit in lead him to fantasise or dare we say embellish the teachings of Joseph Smith – played by Jacob Yarlett) their paths are mashed together and they are sent over to Uganda to attempt their conversion in deepest, darkest Africa.

Elder Price, the brightest elder in his class,  had long been hoping for his mission to be in Florida while Elder Cunningham had just been hoping not to be left behind and maybe make a friend, so their journey was not one either would have chosen, but they endeavour to do their very best.

The African village is in the grasp of an evil dictator (with possibly one of the funniest names ever written, but for sensitive eyes I will not repeat it here) so not only do the missionaries have to overcome the villagers’ scepticism, they also need to challenge the guns and brutality that prevents them from choosing their own path.  Village sweetheart Nabulugi (the wonderful Nicole-Lily Baisden) finally recognises that the Elders have a story to believe in (though it is Elder Cunningham’s version they are told, complete with his addition of some less than authentic characters and events) and manages to convince the rest of her tribe to accept their teachings and convert.

For anyone who has watched South Park (either the TV show or their 1999 feature movie Bigger, Longer, Uncut) you know that Stone and Parker will never shy away from ripping open society and inserting their own observations with a locker-room attitude.  Origins of religion, Disney corporation and American obsession with their past are mashed up with FGM, racial oppression, homosexuality and even Brexit and given a high-octane make over with some brilliant songs and dance routines.  Casey Nicholaw’s choreography and Colm O’Regan as musical director have created ‘Broadway plus’ with the showstopping scenes jam packed with glitz and glam.

Book of Mormon is, without doubt, for those who are not easily offended (or those who feel that in today’s climate they have become so desensitised that they need a big boot up the behind to remember how to be offended again).  The audience reactions are split between laughing out loud and gasps of faux indignation but above all else, it is a wonderfully safe environment in which no one will judge you on what you find funny; let rip with the belly laughs, it's good for the soul.

The Book of Mormon is running at Sunderland Empire until September 14^th with tickets still available.  Sunderland Empire is one of the best theatres in the UK for musical productions and their embrace of BOM makes it the perfect evening.

https://www.atgtickets.com/shows/the-book-of-mormon/sunderland-empire/

Les Miserables at Theatre Royal Newcastle

THE must see production of our generation, this is phenomenal theatre which redefines excellence.

Based on Victor Hugo’s story of the French revolution and blending sin, redemption, hope and despair, Les Mis is as relevant and compelling in today’s society as it was in the mid 19^th Century. 

On tour and bringing over 30 years of West End success, this is an opportunity to join in the revolution at one of the country’s best venues for amazing theatre.

The sets are epic, scenes mould and flex right before your eyes and are magical in the way they change; the lighting and use of projection is breathtaking and the sound, especially during the battle scenes, is reminiscent of Hollywood war films, the audience ducking and shaking as gun shots and ricochets whistle all around the auditorium.

Last night we witnessed, in abundance,  a normally very rare occasion in live theatre – complete silence.  Silence as the audience sat transfixed through every scene, breaths held in awe and anticipation; silence used brilliantly by the cast & orchestra to heighten the drama and of intimate scenes as a counterpoint to the intensity of the impending battles and, at the end of two particular songs, Bring Him Home and On My Own, a full second of spellbound silence before the audience erupted into applause. 

Killian Donnelly as Jean Valjean gives a brilliant portrayal of a man consumed – initially by his desire to escape, then by his own disillusionment of society as he is shunned (despite his desire to make something good of his life) and finally trying to make peace with his past and protect the future of his family.  Donnelly’s range and emotional input ensure that the audience share his raw anger in Who Am I and his angst and turmoil in Bring Him Home.

Nic Greenshields plays Javert, the former prison warden turned bounty hunting law maker who crosses paths again and again with Valjean, their fates entwined like two ivy vines each striving to fulfil their own destinies.  Nic portrays Javert as a larger than life man, huge stage presence with a palpable obsession for law and order.  The dynamic between Donnelly and Greenshields is of such constant tension that it is almost a relief when Javert, unable to stand Valjean’s hold over him after saving his life,  jumps into the Seine (a scene which brilliantly makes use of stage and projection)

The other standards which have become musical theatre folklore include the riotous Master of The House (which needs very close watching to catch all the tricks and stunts), the heartbreaking I Dreamed a Dream and the anthemic One More Day, all of which are set and choreographed so perfectly that it is impossible to think of anyway they could be bettered.

For anyone who has watched and enjoyed the star filled Hollywood film version (with Hugh Jackman et al) this production is how Les Mis SHOULD be watched.  It is a piece of art and entertainment that defines excellence and brilliance and Newcastle Theatre Royal is the perfect host.  I am sure the ghosts of productions past were joining the full house in the 5 minute standing ovation.

This Cameron Macintosh production of Les Misérables runs at Newcastle Theatre Royal until 5^th October with tickets and availability here - https://www.theatreroyal.co.uk/whats-on/les-miserables